Myaxwonderland’s Weblog

So basically i’ve never been anyone really special, never the most athletic or the fastest, I’ve never been the prettiest girl in school, or the smartest in class. I’ve just been myself just this, someone who is always there always watching, always wondering who everyone else is and where and how did they get their titles… Why don’t i have a title? What is it about titles anyway, there’s the teacher, the mother, father, daughter, sister, brother, cop, clerk, executive chef at a prestigious restaurant in France. But why does that title make you so special, you’re a person just like me, why don’t i have a title that everyone can remember me by. I’m like the camera’s in the ceiling which by the way half of them don’t work at school they’re just there to create fear, those camera’s are actually crap and even the ones that work aren’t being watched. I learned this from someone with a title. It’s nice to be a nobody who knows everything. When no one knows you exist you have the window to the world. I know I wrote that once before, I’m not sure where and it really doesn’t matter anyway. On a note that actually means something, I’d like to pretend that I’m finally happy, maybe not in the way that other people are, but happy in a way that lets me function if not fully then temporarily without the help of drugs or men. In body I’m 17, in the mind I’m somewhere around 30 without the degree of course, i mean if i could i would but i cant so i wont. If what i said ever really mattered to anyone, if anyone would listen i might actually surprise them.